失业了，别人不会告诉你的10件事。你可以就此堕落，也可以把失业当做一次自我发现的机会。

The first 30 days after a job loss will no doubt be filled with fear, anxiety and impatience. You might hear experts talk about the importance of updating your resume, leaning on your network of contacts and even starting that hobby you always wanted to try. Here, Ariane de Bonvoisin, author of The First 30 Days: Your Guide to Making Any Change Easier, shares some tips for coping with a job loss that people won't necessarily tell you about.

1. Give yourself some real time to figure out your next step.That may mean weeks, not a few hours! Don't feel compelled to jump right back into the work force. You will feel some shock-the same way you would feel shock after any loss. Take some time to deal with that. When you are ready to jump back in, keep your options open. This might be a good time to explore a new field that you've always wanted to try but never had the time to, start a business, or go back to school.

2. The next job you take may be a transitional one.Whether it's full or part time, embrace it. Every experience is a valuable one and you never know where it may lead. It's OK to freelance or find part-time work to get some cash flow until you find the perfect new position. In fact, you may find that you don't need a full-time job as much as you thought you did to be happy and secure.

3. Look for companies, not jobs, and change the way you apply.Find companies with missions and values that you can get behind. Employers are much more interested in candidates who have a passion for the company than someone who is just looking for a paycheck. Remember, your resume and cover letter are not unique. With the huge number of layoffs today, there are likely to be many more people you have to compete against for a single position. You have to find new skills and new selling points in your abilities to highlight on your resume and your social networking pages.

Your reputation and your online persona play much more of a role in getting you a new job than your resume or your cover letter ever could. Your profiles on Facebook, MySpace and LinkedIn should be spruced up and optimized as much as possible to make you as attractive as you can be to a potential employer. And don't forget to Google yourself to see what comes up.

4. Celebrate-maybe even take a vacation.You probably didn't take time away while you were at your last job-use this period of adjustment to break free. It'll give you a chance to get some perspective. Have drinks or a party and celebrate being laid off. Put a positive spin on this. Enjoy yourself. This will be one of the few times in life that you're unencumbered by work. Read. Sleep. Do all the things you never get to do…believe it or not, you'll miss this time when it's gone.

5. Use your health insurance while you still have it.I bet you haven't been taking care of yourself or haven't had the time. Get a full physical, go to the dentist. You can also explore meditation, acupuncture, or other complimentary therapies that can help you de-stress. Finding your next dream job is an endurance test and requires a lot of energy. Start eating well, do a cleanse, and go to the gym. Your energy and self-esteem will get a boost and this will be felt by everyone around you, including future employers.

6. Realize that something good will come from this （I call this The Change Guarantee）.Write it down somewhere visible. In the end, this job loss is probably a good thing. Make yourself write a list of 3 things that help you see the upside from this downside. You'll end up better off, no matter what. You may not see it now, but you'll triumph over this job loss in ways you couldn't imagine.

7. Don't rehash the story, blame something or someone for the loss or explain it to everyone ad nauseam.Blame never accomplishes anything. Don't get addicted to your story: Why you got fired or how unlucky you are. It will hold you back. There is no shame or embarrassment to be had. Every successful person has lost a job at some stage. Instead of feeling shame, honor this as just a life change that will make you stronger. Stick around optimistic people, not victim circles. Ask yourself, "Who are you not thinking of that can help you?" And also, "Who is holding you back?"

8. Always frame things in the positive.Say things like "I'm excited I'm back in the job market. It has given me a chance to really go after a job that I love," as opposed to, "I recently got fired/lost my job." People who are optimists and have positive beliefs will always get through this change better than others.

9. Let go of the way life should have gone.Resisting the job loss causes more pain. Sometimes you know why you were fired, sometimes you just don't. Don't waste any time figuring it out. Be mature about anything you feel may have contributed to it. See the difference between reality and illusion （reality is you lost your job, illusion is you'll never find another job.） Take a moment to go inside yourself, get silent and listen to your intuition. Some of your best ideas will come when you slow down enough and tune in.

10. Looking for a job is now your job.It may take a lot longer to find a new job than you think it will. Many people are running out their unemployment benefits, taking six months or more to find a new job. You might have to settle for less. We're in a tough economic climate and the dream job you want might not be available for the next few years. Some jobs leave the market and never come back, and you may be facing that reality. Don't get discouraged. Remember, even in a bad economy, there are always jobs for good people.

失业后的起初30天，无疑你会感到担忧，焦虑，急躁。或许你听到专家建议说，更新简历，仰仗人际关系，甚至是去尝试自己一直想做的事情，这些是多么重要。在此，为大家献上Ariane de Bonvoisin的着作，起初30天：怎样让改变来的更容易，教你一些如何应对失业的秘诀。

1.给自己一些时间去想想下一步该怎么办。这可能需要几周，而不是几个小时！不要因为重归劳动大军而感到不情愿。你会遭受一些打击，就像失去其他东西时一样。给自己一点时间去适应。当你做好了准备，眼界放宽点。这对你来说可能是一次很好的机会，你可以去做一直想做而又没时间去做的事情，也可以尝试做点生意，或是重返校园。

2.你的下一份工作可能只是暂时性的。不管是全职，还是兼职，欣然接受它。不管是怎样的经验，总有一天会用到。做一个自由职业者没什么不好，你可以先找一份兼职，直到找到理想的工作。事实上，你可能会发现，不一定非要做全职，也可以过的很开心，很潇洒。

3.看重公司，而不是工作本身，改变应聘的方式。找那些使命和价值观与你本身相符合的公司。因为雇主更青睐于那些对公司抱有热情的人，而不是一个只想挣点工资花花的人。记住，你的简历和求职信并不是独一无二的。面对失业大军，会有很多人竞相争夺一个职位。所以在简历上和社交方面，你必须更加突出自己的技能和非凡能力。

你在网上的声誉和给人的印象会比简历和求职信更有益于你找到一份新工作。把你在Facebook,MySpace,LinkedIn上的照片装饰的漂亮点，并尽可能的让自己显得有魅力，以便有潜在雇主雇用你。不要忘了Google一下自己，看你会发现什么。

4.庆祝一下-甚至可以去度个假。在你还没失去工作的时候，你可能没有时间休息--利用这段时间去呼吸一下新鲜空气，欣赏一下美景。喝上一杯，或是开个舞会，为自己的失业庆祝一下。看的开点。活的开心点。这可能是你一生中为数不多的几次机会，可以不受工作的约束。看书。睡觉。做所有以前没做过的事情…不管你信不信，你会怀念这段时光的。

5.趁你还有医疗保险，好好利用它。我敢打赌你没有好好照顾自己，或是没有时间去好好照顾自己。去做个全身检查，瞧瞧牙医。尝试接受冥想疗程，针灸，或其他补充疗程，这样可以帮助你缓解压力。重新找到一份理想工作是对耐力的一种考验，需要很多精力。所以要好好吃饭，净化一下内心，去健身房锻炼锻炼。你的精力和自尊会得到提升，身边的每个人都会感觉到，包括未来雇主。

6.情况必定会好转（我称之为改变的保证）.在显眼的地方写下来。最后，失去工作会变成一件好事。写下三件能让你从逆境中看到希望的事情。最终你会受益，不管是什么。可能现在你没发觉，但是你会以想象不到的方式战胜失业。

7.不要斤斤计较，怨天尤人，或者啰啰嗦嗦地解释给每个人听。抱怨于事无补。不要沉迷于：为什么被解雇，或是多么不走运。这只会拖你后腿。没必要感到羞耻，或尴尬。与其感到羞耻，还不如把它当做是对自己的一次磨练。留意一下周围乐观的人，不要总是看到不幸的一面。扪心自问，"还有谁你没想到可以帮助你的？又是谁在拖你后腿？".

8.乐观地看待问题。告诉自己，"很高兴能回到人才市场。这让我可以追求自己喜欢的工作，"而不是想着，"最近我被炒了鱿鱼/丢掉了工作".乐观的人，或是抱有乐观信条的人，总能比其他人更容易跨过难关。

9.顺其自然。抗拒失业只会让你更加痛苦。有时候你知道为什么被解雇，有时候根本就没有原因。不要浪费时间来想这个。成熟点，该付出的总是要付出。区别现实和假象（现实是你丢掉了工作，假象是你永远找不到新工作。）反思一下自己，静静的聆听你内心的声音。最终，你会感到豁然开朗。

10.找工作就是你现在的工作。找到一份新工作可能比想象的要花更多的时间。很多人用光了失业保险，花了六个月甚至更长时间才找到新工作。至少要有落脚的地方。现在经济不景气，你梦想中的工作可能今后几年都不好找到。有些工作一去不返，必须面对现实。不要灰心。记住，即便经济糟糕，强者也总能找到工作。