For two years now, we have collectively gorged on tales of tears and deeds of downfall. If the bulls really are back and the economic and financial misery is about to end, here are 16 reasons why we will miss the gloomy times.

1. Role-play will be a lot less pleasurable. We have split the world into two pantomimic parts: the evil (the bankers) and the good (everyone else). In future, sorting out villains and victims will require more imagination.

2. The crisis has favoured inexpensive, socially constructive pastimes such as bird-watching, book-reading and communal needlework. More aggressiveactivities will soon be on the rise again.

3. The prophets of doom have had a field day. Yet we feel strangely comfortable with the Cassandras. We have enjoyed being told that the light at the end of the tunnel signals an approaching train. Now we will have to get re-acquainted with the optimists – a much more dangerous and unsettling bunch of people.

4. During the recession we profited from empty planes, hotels, restaurants and buses. When recovery comes we will have excess demand again. The good life, when it returns, will be a lot more crowded.

5. Prices have been falling. Is that not what everyone always wanted? Now everything – from apples to yachts – will be going up again. And won’t we now all start suffering from the Great Inflation? What would you rather have: Austerity Britain or Weimar Germany?

6. The central banks have become the people’s friends, with even the European Central Bank cutting interest rates. Not long from now, rates will be rising again. Goodbye to bargain-basement banks, dirt-cheap consumer credit and rock-bottom mortgages.

7. Many high street stores selling goods that no one wanted to buy have closed, prompting art galleries and other edifying enterprises to move in to the vacant sites. Alas, all these shops peddling tawdry knick-knacks will be back with us again.

8. People have started to eat less. Obesity has been on the decline. There has been a boom in home-grown vegetables. Once the economy starts to grow again, the nation’s health will plummet.

9. Dinner party talk of house price rises will return. People will no longer be ashamed of being estate agents. Sons and daughters will again want to go into investment banking rather than eco-farming.

10. We will have to get used to a new, painful jargon. “Quantitative easing” was bad enough. The vocabulary of recovery is still less elegant. Prepare for the central banks selling their enormous holdings of government bonds to drive up interest rates. Practise saying “quantitative firming”.

11. Service blossoms in a downturn. Waiters wait, usherettes usher, doormen open doors. GDP growth = general grumpiness.

12. It is good to have scapegoats. We have been delighted to blame the mess on George W. Bush, the former US president, and Gordon Brown, the UK prime minister. Now President Barack Obama will take all the credit for the upswing. He may become slightly smug. The upshot: anti-Americanism will surge.

13. Energy use will rise again. With a good strong depression under way, we thought we had global warming licked. Not so! We will have to endure a new and mighty role for Opec and the sprouting up everywhere of new nuclear power stations.

14. Reining in the Russians will be more difficult when the oil price starts to push through $100 a barrel. So it will be scowls, not smiles, from President Dmitry Medvedev. And let’s not even think of how the Iranians will start to behave.

15. The bane of the 21st century – current account imbalances – has been coming nicely under control. Now all this will be out of control again. The dollar will plummet. Worse news, the foreign exchange dealers will run out of other currencies to sell it against.

16. China will really start to throw its weight around when its export motor goes back into overdrive. Mandarin will be the new official language of the European Union. Forget the SDR. The central bankers’ new official currency: the renminbi.

Once everything gets back to normal, we will soon begin to discern the green shoots of a new crisis. And it will be a lot worse than the 2007-09 version. Happy times!

这一年多以来，我们经历了太多血泪，目睹了太多的失败。但是当有一天形势回暖，所有的经济金融惨剧都落下帷幕时，我们也许会想念这段沉抑的时光，因为以下这16点理由。

1.角色扮演将不会那么有意思了。现在我们把整个世界上的人分成了两种角色：坏蛋（银行家们）和好人（所有其他的人）。以后，区分坏蛋和受害者将需要更多的想象力。

2.危机繁荣了那些廉价的，有利于人与人之间交流的消遣活动，比如说赏鸟，阅读，甚至是聚在一起干针线活。经济回暖之后，那些粗野的活动又将卷土重来了。

3.那些悲观派的预言家着实忙活了一阵。然而奇怪的是我们居然对这些唱衰者不那么反感了。就算他们告诉我们，隧道那边那微弱的光亮不是希望，而是一辆要把我们碾碎的列车，我们也能够接受。那些乐观预言者反而越来越不受欢迎了，事实证明他们其实是一群更危险，更使人不安的人

4.在经济危机的时候，我们可以享受空得仿佛是专门为你而开的飞机，酒店，饭馆和公车。复苏来临时，这一切又将被过度需求所填满。在所谓的繁荣时期，到处都是拥挤的。

5.由于危机，物价下降了！这难道不是所有人梦寐以求的吗？现在，所有的东西，不管是苹果还是游艇，都将渐渐涨价。难道我们现在又要开始受通货膨胀的折磨了吗？二战后的百废待兴的英国，还是魏玛政府时期的物价飞涨的德国？

6.央行成为了人们的好朋友，因为甚至欧洲中央银行都为了缓解危机而降息。很快，利率又将再次上扬。和像商场特价部一样的银行和银行里那些超便宜的消费品信用贷款，抵押贷款说永别吧~~

7.许多大街旁的店铺都因为没人来买东西而关闭了，这使画廊等一些有教育意义的事业得以搬进这些空出来了的门面。唉……危机后，喧哗着兜售那些俗艳之物的摊位又会回来烦我们的。

8.人们开始注意食量了。肥胖症人数正在减少。越来越多人开始在自家种植蔬菜。一旦经济复苏，我们国民的健康将会经历大滑坡。

9.危机以后，人们又会在宴会上喋喋不休的谈论价格上涨了。没有人会羞于承认自己是房产经纪人。孩子们又会想要学习投资银行学而不是生态农业学了。

10.我们将不得不适应一些专业词汇。“量化宽松”这个词已经够烦人的了，关于复苏的词汇却会更加别扭。小心，央行又要出售大量的政府债券去拉高利率了。练习一下说“量化稳健”吧！

11.服务行业的服务水平在危机中有了长足的提高，不论是服务员，领座员还是门童都是如此。这说明：GDP增长=人们脾气变坏。

12.找个替罪羊是个很好的心理安慰方法。我们总是把当前的混乱局面归功于美国前总统布什和英国首相布朗。经济复苏的功劳将被新上任的奥巴马总统全权领受。他可能会因此变得有点得意自满。这样的结果就是：反美情绪又会高涨。

13.能源的使用又将增加。在当下大萧条的背景下，我们认为我们已经解决了气候变暖的问题。其实不是这样的！危机过后，我们还将要忍受Opec的强势和到处都是的新核电站。

14.俄罗斯会变得越来越难控制，因为油价将要升过100美元一桶了。我们要做好准备看梅德韦杰夫总统的脸色了，他将不会再对我们笑脸相迎。伊朗人们会怎么表现更是不可想象。

15.21世纪世界最大的隐患就是各国的经常项目不平衡。我们一直以来都很好的控制了它，但是现在形势有失控的趋势。美元会大幅度贬值。更坏的是，外国的外汇炒家到那时会疯狂的抛出其他货币买进美元，以至于其他货币都不够用了。

16.当中国的出口发动机又开始运作时，中国将发挥它在世界各方面的影响力了。普通话会变成欧盟新的官方语言。忘记什么SDR(特别提款权)吧，人民币将成为各国央行的新的官方货币。

即使一切恢复正常，我们也将很快发现一场新的危机正在萌芽。新的危机将比这个2007-09版本“刺激”得多。好好享受吧！