They say life is what we make of it. By the end of this post, I hope to have helped you decide whether that statement is true or not.
There is no doubt that life has its ups and downs. However, how we deal with them can sometimes make all the difference. Today I want to share eight harsh truths that I've come to learn from life. There's also a message in each that I think we can all learn from, and when applied, will improve our lives infinitely.
Some of these lessons may be old-hat for you. If so, look for ways to refine the idea to ensure your getting the most out of it. On the other hand, you may completely disagree with an idea or two and that's great! Let us know your thoughts so we can all learn from each other.
1. Friends Come and Go
When I was in high school, I always imagined spending most of my life with the same people. Then when I realized I had to move to college, that all changed. Once again, I made some close college friends but left them all behind when I moved from the UK to South Africa.
Friends will always come and go in your life; even though I'm back in the UK now, all my friends are in university around the country and not exactly in meeting distance. It can be a hard thing to accept, but many of the friends you spend time with now, might not be around in the next few years.
Important Lesson: There are an abundance of amazing people out there for you to meet and build relationships with. If you don't have many friends, don't stress, there are literally billions of friendship possibilities.
2. You Won't Always Get What You Want
I remember one Christmas when the only thing I had asked for was some second hand turntables for DJ'ing. I didn't ask for anything else so I was pretty sure I would get them. However, they didn't come and I ended up having to save for 10 months on my own in order to purchase them.
You won't always get what you want in life: people are going to be late, people will let you down, items you want won't always be available.
Important Lesson: Don't look for happiness in material possessions and if things don't go your way, learn to accept them. Life's too short to stay miserable.
3. Many People Will Love You, but Many Will Not
Whether you are a celebrity, a charity worker or just a normal guy, there are going to be people that love you and what you do, but there's also going to be plenty people that don't like you. There are many possible reasons such as jealousy, similarities to them, or just not being someone's 'type'.
Important Lesson: Not everyone is always going to like you, and that's fine. If people want to spend time talking about you then that is their problem. You are perfect as you are. You shouldn't need everyone to like you to have some form of self-esteem.
4. Nobody Can Transform Your Life Like You Can
Wouldn't it be lovely if we didn't have to go up on stage, but we could just read a paragraph of a blog post and become a perfect public speaker? Or, wouldn't it be nice if our friends could do daring things, and we would benefit from them as well?
The support and help of others can only take you so far, you're going to have to do your own thing to make big changes in your life situation.
Important Lesson: Do things for yourself and learn to stand on your own two feet. People you rely on won't be around forever, and you don't want to have to use others as a crutch to get anywhere in life.
5. You Are Going to Fail
I built more than 7 websites before I created one that actually started making me any money. I even put hundreds of hours into my own company that I actually closed down last month. Whether it is exams, projects, companies, or even the odd pub quiz, there are times when you will fail to meet your goals.
As the saying goes - "Only those who are asleep make no mistakes".
Important Lesson: You can learn a lot from others, but it is your own failures that are going to teach you the most valuable lessons in life. Learn from your failures, embrace them, and use them to drive you on to success.
6. Rain Will Sometimes Cancel Play
On some occasions when you have your shorts on and you're ready for the beach, it's going to rain. Or, when you get to that first hole and you're ready to tee off - the clouds will open. Things aren't always going to go how you would like them to.
Important Lesson: Don't stress about the things that you can't control. Learn to live with things that happen. You can't change the past, but you can change how you react to things.
7. There May Be No Tomorrow
At least, not for you anyway. We never know what is around the corner, a car crash, a heart attack; heck...even the end of the world is possible. Let's face it, although we would all like to live till we are 70 years old, that's certainly not always the case. There will be one day that is our last.
Important Lesson: Make the most of each day. Make sure the people you care about actually know it, don't worry about little matters, just make sure you spend time doing the things you love.
8. Someone Else Will Always Have More
Whether it is money, partners, friends or even blog subscribers, there will always be areas where other people have more than you. That isn't to say you can't become abundant in whatever you want (i.e. someone always had more money than Warren Buffett until 2008 when he was noted to be the richest man in the world).
The wanting of more actually holds a very important lesson...
Important Lesson: Just because someone has 'more', that doesn't mean they are happy. Read the biography of any celebrity and they will tell you they enjoy their process of earning money, rather than what money can do to make them happy. In other words, focus on what you love, not what the thing you love can get you.
BONUS: Linking all the lessons here together is actually quite simple, and I can share the majority of what you need to know to enjoy life in a few simple bullet points:
* Live life for the moment
* Accept what is, even if things don't go your way
* Happiness is here, right now if you stop resisting and start accepting
I hope you all enjoyed my slightly unique take on the topic of improving your life. I would love to hear some harsh (but necessary) truths in the comments below!
他们说生活是由你自己创造的。看到帖子末尾的时候,我希望这邮件已帮助你判断这种说法是对是错。
毫无疑问,生活有起有伏。然而,有时候我们处理问题的方式能让事情变得完全不一样。今天我想和大家分享我从生活中学到的八项严峻的事实。我认为我们都可以从每项事实里学到一点东西,如果我们应用它,它将无限的改善我们的生活。
在这些经验中,有些对你来说可能已经过时了。如果是这样的话,那就想办法提炼那些观点,保证你可以从这些观点中获得最多的好处。另一方面,你可能完全赞同其中的一两个观点,那就太好了!让我们知道你的想法,这样我们才能相互学习。
1. 朋友聚散离合
我读高中的时候,我总是想象着和志同道合的人共度生命的大部分时光。后来当我意识到我必须上大学的时候,一切都变了。我又在大学结交了一些密友,但是当我离开(大不列颠及北爱尔兰)联合王国到南非去的时候,我就离开了他们。
在你的生命中,朋友总是聚散离合;即使我现在回到了大不列颠及北爱尔兰)联合王国,我所有的朋友都是在国家周围的大学,并不是在很近的距离。很难接受这件事,但是你现在花时间在很多朋友身上,可能过几年他们就不在你身边了。
重要的经验: 你会碰到很多了不起的人,并和他们交朋友。如果你还没有很多朋友,不同要太在意,实际上还有大把的机会交朋友。
2. 你并不总会得到你想要的
我记得在一次圣诞节,我唯一想要的一样东西就是一些二手唱盘的DJ’ing。我没有要求要别的东西,所以我非常确定我会得到它们。然而,我并没有得到,我最后不得不自己节省了十个月才买到
在生活中你并不总是得到你想要的:人们会迟到,人们会让你失望,你并不总可以得到想要的东西。
重要的经验: 不要在物质上寻找快乐,如果事情进行不顺利,那么就要学会接受。生命太短暂,不要停留在不愉快的事中。
3. 很多人会喜欢你,但也有很多人会不喜欢你
不管你是一位名人,一位慈善工作者,或只是一个普通人,肯定会有人喜欢你以及你所做的事,但也肯定会有很多人不喜欢你。可能有很多原因,比如嫉妒,和他们有相似之处,或者仅仅不是某些人的“类型”。
重要经验:并不是每个人都会喜欢你,那很正常。如果人们愿意花时间来谈论你,那是他们的事。你还是那样完美。为了某种形式的自尊,你没必要要求每个人都喜欢你。
4. 没有人 能像你一样能改变你的生活
如果我们不想上舞台,但是我们可以读读博客帖子,然后我们也会成为一个完美的公共发言者,这不是很好吗?或者如果我们的朋友做了一些大胆的事情,我们也可以从他们身上受益,这不是很好吗?
别人的支持和帮助仅仅能让你达到这种程度,为了让你的生活发生巨大的变化,你必须得去做你自己的事。
重要的经验: 为你自己做一些事情,并且学会自给自足。你要依靠的人不会永远在你身边,而且你不要想着必需利用别人作为拐杖达到你生活的某些成就
5. 你将会失败
在我开始建立一个的确能让我赚钱的网站之前,我就已经建了不止七个网站了。我甚至把很多时间都投入到了我的公司,然而事实上上个月我的公司就已经倒闭了。不管是考试,规划,公司或者甚至是酒吧各种各样的问答比赛,你总会有失败的时候。
俗话说“只有睡着了的人才不会犯错误”。
重要经验: 你可以在别人身上学到很多,但正是你自己经历的失败教会你生命生最有价值的经验。从你的失败中学习,欣然接受他们,并利用它们引领你走向成功。
6. 下雨有时候会让你取消运动
有时候,当你穿好短裤正准备去海滩的时候,天就要下雨了。或者当你到达第一个球洞正准备发球的时候—乌云密布了。事情并不总是如你所愿的方向进展。
重要经验: 你控制不了的事就不要强求。学会忍受发生的事情。你不能改变过去,但是你可以改变处理事情的方式。.
7. 可能没有明天
起码,对你来说不是这样。我们永远也不知道将会发生什么事,车祸。心脏病发作,愤怒……甚至是世界末日也是可能的。让我们面对它,尽管我们都想活到七十岁,当然并不总会发生那样的事。总有一天是我们的最后一天。
重要的经验: 好好度过每一天。确保你关心的人都知道这一点,不要担心小事情,只要保证时间花在做你喜欢做的事情就可以了。
8. 别人总会拥有更多
不管是金钱,搭档,朋友或者甚至是博客用户,其他人总会在某些方面拥有比你多。那并不是说你不可能在你想要的任何地方变得富有(比如:总会有人到2008年拥有的钱比曾被评为世界上最富有的涡轮巴菲特的钱多)。
想要更多其实蕴含了一个非常重要的哲理……
重要的经验: 只是因为有些人有“更多”,那不意味着他们就开心。阅读任何一位名人的传记,他们都会告诉你他们喜欢赚钱的过程,而不是钱能做多少事使他们开心。换句话说,关注你喜欢的东西,而不是关注你喜欢的东西能给你带来什么。 意外收获: 把这里说的所有经验联系在一起其实很简单,我可以和你分享你需要知道的大部分事情,让你在几个简单的要点下享受生活:
* 充分享受此时此刻的生活
* 接受现实,即使事情未如你所愿
* 幸福就在这里,如果你现在就停止抵抗现实,并开始接受它
在改善你的生活这个话题里,我希望你们都喜欢我提出的一些稍微独特的东西。我喜欢在评论下面听到一些严峻(但必须的)的事实!