Layoff stories like that are all too common. Managers often take a clinical approach when breaking the bad news, fearing they'll get sued if they say the wrong thing, or end up facing angry -- even violent -- employees. But being too cautious can make a boss seem downright heartless.

Executive coaches say small-business owners in particular could use a lesson or two in easing the pain, since they often don't have human-resources specialists to help them out and they may go for long stretches without firing anyone.

Here's some expert advice on how bosses can best express their regret over layoffs and leave their former employees with dignity and self-respect -- and maybe a little less anger.

1 Say the right things.

A manager should sit down in a private area and clearly tell the employees one on one that they are being let go and why, says Karen Lucas, a Chicago executive coach. Bosses who rarely have laid off employees before should rehearse what they will say, and even bring notes into the meeting, so they don't say the wrong things or forget something important.

The basics: Be direct in telling people the company can no longer employ them and explain in detail the financial hardship causing the need for layoffs. And even if performance issues factored into your decision, tell the employees it's not their fault -- it's yours -- and that you've tried to avoid layoffs as much as you could.

People feel better if "you're giving them a sense that this was not an easy decision but this was a decision that needed to be made," says Ms. Lucas.

At the same time, refrain from talking about other employees' situations, which could raise questions of fairness. And don't bring up problems with an employee's performance if you haven't discussed them before. Stick to the point: Explain the financial circumstances that caused the need for layoffs.

You should also give the employee time to react. Some people will be angry, some will cry and some will do nothing at all. But give them time to process what's happening and to ask the questions they need to ask.

Also realize that they may not take in everything you say at such a tough time. So, Ms. Lucas and others recommend presenting laid-off employees with written materials explaining the terms of their layoff, including any severance or other benefits they qualify for.

One final thing to remember: It's good to show sympathy and regret for the situation, but don't pretend you know how they feel, warns Leila Bulling Towne, a San Francisco executive coach. "Fact is, you don't know how they feel, because you're not getting laid off," she says. "Saying that will just make them feel worse."

2 Help them move on.

You can soften employees' pain over the job loss by helping them find their next job, especially now with the economy so bad. Present a list of possible resources for the terminated employee, such as job-placement experts or contacts at other companies hiring in your industry. Assuming they are solid performers, offer to give them a good recommendation and perhaps even reach out to acquaintances who you think may be hiring.

It's also important to consider timing. Some managers prefer to handle layoffs on Friday afternoons, assuming that it gives everybody a chance to decompress. But Ms. Lucas recommends handling layoffs on a Tuesday or Wednesday, so people can immediately do something about their job situation, such as contact a career counselor or a prospective employer. Otherwise, they may just spend the weekend ruminating over the bad news.

3 Allow for transition.

Fearing retribution, some companies have security escort newly laid-off employees immediately to the door -- perhaps allowing them a short detour to their desks to collect belongings.

Not only is this a major insult to employees who have worked hard, but it kills the morale of the employees who witness it. Unless there's valid reason to believe employees will act out, give them some time -- even a few weeks -- to announce their departure to colleagues and plan their next move.

Paul Silvis, founder of Restek Corp., a chromatography company, says he has laid off about 60 employees over the years. He usually allows someone who has been laid off to stay on for up to a couple of months to give the person time to find a new job. He also says he does all he can to coach them and help them find a new position.

Of course, he must trust the individual employees enough to think they'll act appropriately. And they're asked to sign a contract with some ground rules, such as promising they won't steal competitive information.

But Mr. Silvis says the employees feel less like they're being kicked out the door. "The primary thing we try to do is let them leave with their self-esteem," he says.

Mark Eckley无法忘记那一天发生的事：他的100个同事被告知已被裁员，并在保安的监视下被送出公司大门。他们走后，他们的上司还说了几句很不中听的话。

Eckley先生并没有在十二年前的那一天被裁员，但当时的情景让他十分愤怒和担忧，促使他去别处找了新的工作。“我们整天看着窗外那些刚被裁员的人”，Eckley先生说。他是Bellefonte, Pa的一名客户支持专家。“当时心里真的很不是滋味。”

small biz　　用上述方式裁员的做法比比皆是，管理者往往会斩钉截铁地宣布裁员的消息，生怕自己会因说错话而遭到起诉，或是面临来自雇员的愤怒和暴力。但这样做却会让管理者看起来太没有人情味了。

以下列举一些专家提出的建议，管理者可以用这种方法来表达对裁员的遗憾，并给被裁员工留下尊严和宽慰，至少不会太过生气。

1、说正确的话

芝加哥的一名高管教练Karen Lucas提议，管理者应和员工在一个专门的场所进行谈话，明确地告诉他将被裁员，以及他为什么会被裁员。管理者在进行谈话前应该先准备一下到时候该怎么说，甚至可以记在笔记本上，这样就不会说错话或是遗漏些什么了。

关键在于，要直截了当地告诉员工他将不再被公司聘用，并向他描述是公司的经济状况导致了裁员。虽然你在作决定时也考虑到了该员工的表现，但你只要告诉他这不是他的错，而是公司的错，只是你已经竭尽全力想要减少裁员了。

Lucas女士说，当别人觉得裁员虽然是个困难的决定但却是必须作的决定时，他们就会觉得舒服些。

同时，要避免谈及别的员工的情况，否则会让员工质疑公平问题。不要主动谈及员工的表现，要围绕主题：是公司的经济状况导致了裁员。

你还要让员工有时间反应过来。有些人会非常生气，大声嚷嚷，也有些人会非常平静，什么都不做。但你需要给他们时间反应过来，让他们知道发生了什么，也好提些问题。

一位旧金山的高管教练Leila Bulling Towne提醒道，还有一点要记住的是：要表现出同情和惋惜之情，不要假装自己知道他们是怎么想的。“事实上，你并不知道他们的感受，因为你没有被裁员。假装自己知道他们的感受只会让事情变糟。”

2、帮助他们继续生活

通过帮助被裁员工找到新的工作，自然可以减少他们的痛苦，特别是当经济那么不景气的时候。为这些员工提供一份求职列表，可以从职业咨询专家或联系其他愿在该行业招募员工的公司获得这份列表。如果被裁员工有出色的表现，可以为他们写一封推荐信，或是委托熟人帮他们找到工作。

时间也是需要着重考虑的因素。有些雇主喜欢在周五下午进行裁员，心想这样可以让他们有几天的休息时间。但Lucas女士推荐在周二或周三进行裁员，这样被裁员工可以立刻着手找新的工作，比如咨询求职顾问或联系潜在的雇主。否则他们只能用一个周末的时间来回味裁员的苦果。

3、允许离职过渡期

一些公司担心会遭到报复，就让保安护送被裁员工立刻离开公司。当然，这样的公司还是会给员工一小会的时间整理自己的杂物再离开的。

这种做法不仅对一个向来工作卖力的员工是一种莫大的侮辱，同时也会让目睹这一切的在职员工心寒。除非有充足的理由证明员工会做些出格的事，还是应该给他们一些时间，甚至是几个星期的时间，来由他们自己告诉同事离职的消息，并为下一步作好打算。

Restek Corp.的创始人Paul Silvis说，他一年里裁员了60几个员工，给了他们几个月的时间来找新的工作。他为员工提供培训，竭尽所能地帮助他们找到工作。

当然，他必须相信每个员工会恪守本分，并和他们签署一份协议，以保证他们不会泄露公司的机密。

但是Silvis先生说这些员工根本不像是被裁员，“我们要做到的事让他们离开得有尊严。”