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如何在事业与生活中走运

放大字体缩小字体发布日期:2008-08-18
核心提示:How many of you believe this? Why do you believe it? Are you one of the lucky ones? Or does luck seem to pass you by? And just what is luck, anyhow? According to John D. Krumboltz and Al S. Levin, theres no such thing as luck. In fact, they shirk th


      How many of you believe this? Why do you believe it? Are you one of the lucky ones? Or does luck seem to pass you by? And just what is luck, anyhow?

      According to John D. Krumboltz and Al S. Levin, there’s no such thing as luck. In fact, they shirk the use of the word in their book Luck Is No Accident: Making the Most of Happenstance in Your Life and Career, opting instead to use “happenstance”, a word with less baggage. Krumboltz and Levin argue that luck/happenstance isn’t something that randomly effects us — it’s something that we create out of the chance situations and encounters that run through our lives:

      Have you ever noticed that unplanned events — chance occurrences — more often determine your life and career choices than all the careful planning you do? A chance meeting, a broken appointment, a spontaneous vacation trip, a “fill-in” job, a newly discovered hobby — these are the kinds of experiences — happenstances — that lead to unexpected life directions and career choices.

      The key is to recognize these opportunities and to act on them. Here are some techniques the authors suggest we can use to turn happenstance to our advantage.

      Make the most of unplanned events. We are constantly bombarded by the unexpected. Most of the time, we dodge unplanned events in order to return to our normal lives. We fear the spontaneous. But if you can relax, open your mind, and roll with the unexpected, new opportunities will unfold.
      Share your interests and experiences with people you meet. You don’t need to force your story on others. But learn to strike up conversations with people you meet in daily life. Ask them about their lives. They’ll ask you about yours. As Keith Ferrazzi notes in Never Eat Alone, this is a great way to form connections you might otherwise miss. It’s a great way to turn a random encounter into a possible “lucky break”. (Sometimes you will be a source of luck for the people you meet, just as they will sometimes be a source of luck for you.)


      Always keep your options open. Goals are good. But single-minded devotion to a goal can often blind one to other opportunities. It’s also a mistake to cling to a path you hate out of a sense of obligation. If you enter law school and discover you hate it, quit. Don’t endure years of misery because you feel it’s expected of you. “Refuse to serve a life sentence of misery,” the authors write. You have more options than you think. But you may need to open your eyes to see them.
      Wake up — before your dreams come true. When I was a boy, I loved computers. Computer programmers, like those in WarGames and Real Genius, were my heroes. But when I finally got a chance to program computers, it wasn’t anything like I had imagined it. It was drudgery. I gave up my dream and moved on to something else. Pursue goals, but be sure to reassess your progress and your priorities at regular intervals to prevent yourself from becoming trapped in a reality that is nothing like your dreams.
      Try it — even without knowing the outcome. Two of the best ways to “be lucky” are to be willing to take calculated risks and to embrace unexpected opportunities. Try new things. Go new places. Don’t just do the things for which you know the eventual outcome. I’ve learned that the best way for me to grow as a person is to do something completely outside my comfort zone. Good things happen when I do.
      Maintain a strong social network. “Building and maintaining good relationships with other people is an important component for job success,” the authors write. Other people can provide support in times of trouble, they can act as resources when you need information, and they can offer valuable connections to other social networks. Again, Keith Ferrazzi covers many of these concepts in Never Eat Alone, a book that explores the value of strong social networks. (And remember: it’s just as important for you to help others as it is for you to draw upon their help.)
      Go ahead and make mistakes. Do not be afraid to fail. Yes, it’s trite, but it’s true: those who never try, never fail. And those who never fail, never learn. “First ask yourself: What is the worst that can happen?” Dale Carnegie once advised. “Then prepare to accept it. Then proceed to improve on the worst.” If you can learn to react to mistakes constructively, you can actually improve your situation and get on with life.
      Take action to create your own luck. The authors offer a number of useful tips for creating your own luck:
      Act now. Don’t procrastinate. Begin pursuing your goals today.
      Avoid the “sunk cost fallacy”. Just because you’ve spent time and money on something doesn’t mean you can or should continue doing so.
      Take advantage of timely opportunities. Don’t be afraid to say “yes” when a favorable circumstance arises.
      Always do your best work, even when you think the task is unimportant.
      Ask for what you want. If you do not ask, you cannot receive.
      Be persistent. Don’t give up. Work hard.
      Become a lifelong learner. In 50 Success Classics, Tom Butler-Bowdon notes that most successful men and women have made a habit of reading, and of constant self-improvement.
      Follow these seven guidelines, and your “luck” is bound to improve.

      Enjoy yourself — the good life is a balanced life. Here’s advice I sometimes forget. A person who leads a balanced life is happier, more relaxed, more open to new experiences. If you maintain good relationships, pursue satisfying hobbies, go out of your way to help others, and continue to pursue personal growth, you will become a well-rounded person, just the sort that “luck” favors.
      Overcome self-sabotage. Finally, in order to make the most of “luck” and happenstance, you must learn to face down their greatest enemy: your self. Each of us is capable of thwarting good fortune through negative self-talk. We beat ourselves up over our pasts. We tell ourselves that we “can’t” do something before we even try.
      Dale Carnegie once said, “Happiness doesn’t depend on ay external conditions — it is governed by your mental attitude.” Some people might dismiss this as bunk, but research bears it out. Don’t worry about circumstances beyond your control. Learn to control the things you can, including your reaction to the world around you. How you respond to an unfortunate event is often more important than the event itself. Krumboltz and Levin write:

      You have control over your own actions and how you think about the events that impact your life. None us can control the outcomes, but your actions can increase the probability that desired outcomes will occur. There are no guarantees in life. The only guarantee is that doing nothing will get you nowhere.

      Inaction is the surest path to failure. You cannot succeed if you never try. My father used to tell me this, but I never took his advice to heart. I became an expert at doing nothing, at never daring to pursue my dreams. Over the past two years, I’ve begun to overcome this fear, have begun to act. I’ve begun to make my own luck.

      Luck Is No Accident is a short book. Nothing in it is groundbreaking or revolutionary. Yet its common-sense wisdom is a powerful motivator. Whenever I read this book — I’ve read it three times in the past year — I cannot help but come away inspired, ready to make more of my situation, and to try new things. Is it worth owning? Perhaps not. But if you’re the sort of person who wonders why good things only happen to other people, I certainly encourage you to borrow a copy from your local library.

      你们当中有多少人相信这个?为什么你不相信?你是那些有运气的人当中的一员吗?还是运气似乎与你擦肩而过?那么,到底什么是运气呢?

      根据约翰克兰波斯博士和爱尔列文的研究,没有运气这回事,事实上。他们在书中一直回避使用这个词。《运气并非偶然》:让最多的可能性发生在你的生命中和职业中,用选择来代替偶然。这个词有点不合时宜了。克兰波斯和列文为运气和偶然是否一些随机影响我们生活的事物而作出说明。是我们创造了机会和偶然事件来影响我们的生活。

      你是否注意到了?一些计划外的事情也就是偶然事件比那些你专门的计划更多的决定着你的生活和职业的选择。一个偶然的会面,一次不经心的约会,一个自发的假期,一个临时的工作,一个新发现的爱好,总有这样一些人生体验和偶然事件,导致了你无法预知的人生方向和职业选择。

      关键是要认识到这些机会并利用他们。下面是作者给我们的一些如何使偶然变成我们的优势的技巧。

      利用计划外的事件。我们经常会遭遇到无法预料的事。大多数情况下,我们会避开这些计划外的事,回到正常的生活轨道中来。我们害怕一时冲动。但是如果我们放松些,打开自己的思维,把握住那些不期而来的事,新的机遇就会展开。

      同你见到的人分享你的兴趣和经验。你不必强迫别人来听你的故事。但你可以同你日常生活中碰到的人开始交谈。询问他们的生活情况。他们就会同你交流,同时也会问你的一些情况。凯西注意到在集体聚餐时,就是一个很好的方式同别人联系的机会。不然,你会错过它。将偶然的邂逅变成可能的运气。(有时候,你可能是别人的运气的来源,就如同有时别人也是你的运气资源一样。)放开你的选择思路。有目标是很好。但是一门心思的投入一个目标经常会使人忽略其他机会。如果你对所选的道路非常讨厌,只是出于责任而去做,这也是不对的。如果你进入了一个法律学校,自己非常讨厌它,就不会年复一年的忍受这种痛苦的生活因为你会感到一切都在意料之中。“拒绝一种注定的生活,一种可悲的生活。”作者说。你的选择可以比你想到的更多。但是你也许必须打开思维才能见到。在美梦变成现实之前,醒来。当我是一个小孩时,我喜欢计算机,一个计算机程序设计员,就像那些战争游戏和神魔游戏中的主角一样,是我心目中的英雄。但当我最后得到了一个机会为计算机编程时,并不像我原来想像的那么样了。 这真是一件苦差事。我放弃了我的梦想转而做别的事。追求目标。再次确定你的进程和优先要做的事,并且定期检查,可以防止你被现实中一些无关梦想的事缠住。努力尝试,即使你不知道结果。对于运气,两个很好的方式是一,愿意冒着不可避免的危险,愿意拥抱不可知的机会。尝试新事物。去新的地方。不要做那些你一看就知道结果的事。对我来说,最好的成长方式就是做一些完全在我的舒适度之外的事。当我做的时候,就会有一些好的事情发生。保持强有力的社会网络。建立和同别人保持好的联系对于工作的成功是个很好的因素。在你遇到麻烦的时候,其他的人可以给你支持,当你需要信息时,他们可以是你的资源。他们可能提供有价值的其他社会关系网。同时,凯西还指出了共同聚餐时的许多这方面的情况。这本书这本书探讨了强大的社会关系网的价值。(记住:对你来说,帮助别人很重要,意味着你可以得到他们的帮助。)

      往前看,犯错不要紧。不要害怕犯错。虽然这句话很普通,但确实是真理:从来不去做,永远不会犯错误,永远也学不到东西。“首先问你自己,发生的最坏的事情是什么?”戴尔曾经建议。“然后准备接受它。然后继续在最坏的情况下进步。”如果你学会了积极应对错误,你就实际上改进了你的境遇,使你的生活有所进步。

      采取行动为自己创造运气。作者提供了一系列有用的建议来让你创造自己的运气。

      马上行动。不要拖延。今天就开始你的目标。

      避免陷入错误中。 不是说你在某些事上花了很多钱和时间你就可以继续做下去。利用临时的机会。当一个有利的环境到来时,不要害怕说是

      一直把工作做到最好。即使你认为这个工作并不重要。问问自己想要什么。如果你不问,你就不会有所得。坚持。不要放弃。努力工作。终身学习。在50例成功者中,汤姆注意到了大多数男性和女性都有一个读书的习惯。一直不断的自我提高。做到这以上七条。你的运气自然就会提高。

      欣赏你自己--最好的生活 方式就是平衡生活这是我曾经忘记的一些建议。一个善于在生活中取得平衡的人是更快乐的。放松的对于新的体验是开放的。如果你一直保持良好的社会关系,令人满意的习惯。并走出去帮助别人。你就会成为一个完美的人。运气就是青睐你这种人。克服自我的惰性。

      最后,为了促成运气和偶然的发生。你必须克服它们最大的敌人,就是你自己。消极的自我否定使我们每个人都可能会错过好运气。我们被我们的过去打败了。在自己亲自去尝试之前就说自己不能。戴尔卡耐基“快乐并不是依赖于某个特定的环境,而是由我们内心的态度来决定的。有些人也许会躲开这个,但是研究表明,你必须去承受它。不要对你不能控制的环境去担心。学着控制一些你能控制的事。包括对于这个世界的反应。你对于不幸事件的态度比这个事件本身更重要。克兰博茨和列文说。

      你得控制你自己的行为和对影响你的生活的事件如何思考的。没有人能控制结果。但是你的行为可以增加你想要的结果出现的可能性。在生活中没有保证,但唯一的保证是不做让你一无所有的事。

      无为是导致失败最直接的因素。如果你不去试的话,你将永远不会成功。我父亲过去告诉我这一点,但是我过去从没放在心上。我成为了一个一事无成的人。从来不敢去追求自己的梦想。过去两年的时间里,我克服了这 种害怕。开始行动起来。我开始有了自己的好运气。运气绝非偶然是一本很短的书。里面没有什么让人惊奇的事。或者什么革命性的东西。但是这个平常意义上的智慧却是一个有力的动力。无论何时,我读到它过去两年我读了三遍,我情不自禁的受到感染,不忍放下,并随时准备着改变环境,做更多的事,做新的尝试。这本书值得你拥有吗?也许不值得。但当你总是对于为什么好运气总是落到别人头的感到怀疑时,我当然要建议你到当地图书馆去借一本来读一下。

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